Barbara Geier: Gotta love the Swiss

Planning a Swiss outdoor adventure this summer? Hiking and exploring the country’s peaks and valleys? Make sure not to end up in a #S**tMoment – and the folks at Schweizer Alpen-Club SAC (Swiss Alpine Club SAC) and Verband Schweizer Wanderwege (Swiss Hiking Trail Association) have joined forces to make sure that exactly this won’t be happening.

What the heck is she talking about now, you might be thinking. Bear with me, here it goes. This is about the right way of going to the toilet outdoors and, it seems, a fair amount of people roaming the Swiss countryside are not doing it right when overcome by the need and no actual toilet in sight. Because in response to the issue of sanitary products – tissues used as toilet paper, wet wipes, you get the idea – accumulating along hiking routes and other outdoor areas, the Swiss Alpine Club SAC and Swiss Hiking Trail Association felt compelled to launch an awareness campaign, called #Sch****Moment or #S**tMoment. Yes, I mean, let’s just call it what it is.

According to the two organisations, “improper disposal of bodily waste in nature has various negative effects on the environment.” Paper tissue takes up to five years to decompose completely, wet wipes even longer. In addition, “pollutants and pharmaceutical residues in faeces can pollute bodies of water and affect sensitive organisms in aquatic ecosystems.” Right, we don’t want that. Instead, do as the Alpine and hiking trail experts are recommending in their tongue-in-cheek campaign which centres around social media videos that show how #S**tMoments can occur while out in nature and up the mountains.

Ideally, consider toilet stops from the start when planning your hiking tour, using for example facilities at cable car stations or in mountain huts. And if despite the best of plans there’s no loo in sight when you need one, look for a sheltered spot away from the path, keep a minimum distance of 50 metres from any bodies of water and – because this is what we’re talking about here – at a suitable spot, dig a hole about 15 centimetres deep “with a stone or a shovel brought along” and then cover “your droppings with stones or earth.” Naturally, do not leave tissue and other hygiene products behind in nature but use a “smell proof plastic bag” to be “disposed of correctly later” (note the use of the word “correctly”!) when back in the valley.

Unfortunately, what gets completely lost in the English translation here is the delight of the Swiss-German word Plastiksäckli (plastic bag) which sounds a hundred times cuter than any German Plastikbeutel ever could. Gotta love the Swiss, don’t you. And they’re even running a competition on the Swiss Hiking Trail Association website to win one of only ten “strictly limited” #Sch****Moment shovels, “so you can bury your business on the go.” As I said, gotta love the Swiss.

Barbara Geier is a London-based freelance writer, translator and communications consultant. She is also the face behind www.germanyiswunderbar.com, a German travel and tourism guide and blog that was set up together with UK travel writer Andrew Eames in 2010.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this column are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Discover Germany, Switzerland & Austria.